MANAGING YOUR GUESTLIST PART 2
Trim Your Guestlist – Here are 12 Types of Guests that you can eliminate
It can be tempting to simply invite everyone you want to be at your wedding. You are probably feeling so excited about sharing this joyous occasion with everyone you know that you just can’t bear to leave anyone off the list. However, like it or not, you will not be able to invite everyone due to space and budget constraints.
One way on preventing the guest list from growing, let those you’ve invited know that you have limited seating and that you’d appreciate if they didn’t spread the news of your wedding dinner.
But in the event that you realized that you guest list is simply too long and your venue is unable to accommodate or your budget doesn’t allow, you will need to trim your guest list. But how? Here are 12 types of guests that you can consider eliminating from your guest list.
Do note that however, while doing so, always try to be sensitive and considerate towards everyone whilst at the same time respecting your own wishes.
1. THE OBLIGATION
Don’t feel obligated to invite someone simply because that person has invited you to his/her wedding before.
2. THE UNAWARE
If they don’t even know your fiancé exists and that you are engaged, chances are they won’t be offended if they aren’t invited.
3. THE EX CLASSMATE
If you have not spoken to them or seen them in the last year and you are never going to speak to them or see them after your wedding, you can take them off your guest list. This means leaving out the ex-classmates you have not connected within the last five years.
4. THE CONTINGENCY GUEST
This means, ‘if I invite Amy, I’ll have to invite the whole KTV gang’. If so, you can forget everyone.
5. THE PLUS ONE
Although you want to please everybody, it will be useful to set some parameters if you have space constraint. Consider only allocating a plus one only for people who are seriously dating, living together, engaged or married.
You do not have to be obligated to give all your single friends a ‘plus one’ invitation unless they ask to bring a date. If lots of their friends are also invited, they’ll be happy to come solo.
Photo Credit: silvertunes.com
6. THE BELOW 12
This is a constant dilemma and a very difficult decision to make– whether or not to invite children to your wedding day, but if you can skip the kids, you can reduce your guest list down further. The risk of having children ruining the romantic and refined ambience and turning the reception into a children’s party versus your friends and relatives missing out on your special day because they have to stay home to take care of the kids. Weigh the options and decide for yourself. You should also gain their opinion before deciding.
One way to get the hint across to your uncle and aunty who have 5 kids and are not invited, is to list down the names of the guests who are invited only. Be specific. Some simply assume that 1 invitation card = 1 family of 10.
7. THE EX
No matter how friendly the breakup is, it is best not to invite your ex-boyfriend or girlfriend to your wedding, You would not want to take risks on your special day! At any rate, you can let him or her know about the wedding after you are married.
8. THE CO-WORKER
You may feel compelled to invite all your colleagues from the office even though you are not on the same terms with everyone. Perhaps consider to only invite those whom you will hang out with out of working hours. If you have no interactions with a colleague beyond work, then he/she should also not feel offended not to be invited for your wedding. Yes, including your boss. If you are afraid of the politics that may arise after, let those that you are inviting to not spread the word about your wedding reception. If they are close enough, they will be more than happy to do that for you.
1. THE BUSINESS ASSOCIATE
Consider announcing your marriage during a lunch meeting instead – with you footing the bill of course.
1. THE DISTANT RELATIVE
Due to our Chinese culture, parents will probably want to invite all your relatives including some whom you never even heard or seen before. Unless your parents are paying the bill and if space allows, let them know nicely and explain to them that they can’t invite everyone.
2. THE MIGRATED FRIEND OR RELATIVE
If your guests are staying out of town and needs to travel by plane to attend your wedding, consider leaving them out unless they play an important role in your life. Especially if you have to pay for their air ticket!
3. THE TROUBLEMAKER
Last but not least. If someone is known to cause trouble and dampen the happy mood after a couple of drinks or he is known for always having something to complain about, you can consider leaving him/her out.